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Showing posts from June, 2010

Things you never want to hear on a date...

After my recent dating experiment, I decided to share with you the definitive list of lines you don't want to hear on a date... "Mum's waiting outside in the car." "Oh...... there's my ex in that bar. I think the restraining order has expired so it's fine, let's go in!" "Wow! You looked a lot thinner online. He would you look at that, my waist is smaller than yours." "Sorry about that. Broccoli gives me wind." "Committing has never been a problem for me. I've been married three times." "Double vodka on the rocks, please. On second thoughts - just bring me the bottle." "Right, now, you had an extra side order of asparagus, your dessert was £1.65 more, sooooo....." "I'm afraid we can't sleep together for six weeks - my penile implant is still very inflamed." "My anger management classes are going really well..... [to the waiter] NO, I DON'T WANT BLACK PEPPER!!!&q